The Stand-In Read online

  “I’m good at books and maths. I don’t want people to know my name. I just want to live quietly and contentedly. I love you, Aunt Bow. But I’m not you.”

  She sighed and pulled me into a hug. “I know, Gingernut. I know. I’m sorry. I just get so annoyed that Ella can sound like she’s running over a cat and gets mountains of praise, when you’re sitting over there with a perfect concerto and no one gives two hoots unless Ella’s busy.”

  I smiled and gave her a squeeze, deciding not to pull her up on her hyperbole. “You and Super-G and Rica do. That’s all I need.”

  “I’m sorry my big brother’s such a shithead, honey.”

  I gave a short laugh. “It’s okay. Soon, I’ll get to live my own life. One day, I’ll be the star.”

  “Oh, baby,” she sighed. “You’re already my star.”

  We gave each other one more squeeze, then swung to continue heading inside.

  “Ah, girlies. Lovely!” the Super-G cooed. “Your boys will get drunk if you don’t hurry up.” She winked and jiggled her glass towards us as she swept away with a sashay of her hips.

  “You know, most grandmas don’t try to get their granddaughters drunk…”

  “Most grandmas aren’t my mum.” Aunt Bow tipped her head.

  We laughed and went inside to find Ella going on about what she was doing in the coming weeks; the committee, dance recitals, piano recitals, her part in her drama class’ little performance…

  And I tuned out with familiar taste of my one Sunday Tom Collins on my lips.

  Little Drummer Boy

  I liked dance and I liked music, I hadn’t been doing these things for nearly my entire life only to hate them. But they weren’t my favourite subjects. I was just lucky that a lifetime of practise had made me decent at both.

  “Uh… You…” Miss Felicia called on Monday afternoon, waving at me.

  “Yes?” I replied, looking up at her and realising she’d forgotten who I was. “Uh, Chloe.”

  “What was it you do again?”

  “What did you want me to do?”

  She looked at me like she was trying to remember who I was and what instruments I played. As she frowned, her glasses slid down her nose. “Are you related to Ella?”

  I sighed and nodded. “Have been for over seventeen years.”

  “And you’ve been at Winters for…?”

  “Three and a half years.”

  The rest of the class was, not surprisingly, wondering when she’d get to her point and how much longer she was going to focus on Ella Cowan’s little nobody of a sister. The mutterings of boredom began.

  “And you play…?”

  “Piano and guitar.”

  She brightened somewhat. “Like Ella. She plays the piano beautifully.”

  I nodded. If beautiful here meant half the time she sounded like she was strangling a particularly melodious cat – to quote Aunt Bow.

  “Well, hop on up then and we’ll see how you do,” she said as though it was my first time in front of the keys.

  I pulled myself off the floor and went up to the piano. I wasn’t going to be a concert pianist like my father could have been – no matter what Aunt Bow liked to think – but I wasn’t exactly bad at it after something like eleven years. Still, anything that drew the least amount of attention to me was great. So I played her a relatively simple piece and even threw a wrong note in there for good measure. When I was done, she looked at me like she was surprised I was as good as I was.

  “Well, very nice…work…” And she’d already forgotten my name again.

  I nodded and went back to my spot while Miss Felicia called on the next student. Honestly, sometimes I wasn’t sure my grades were actually based on how well I did or on how guilty the teachers felt about forgetting who I was in the shadow of the great Ella Cowan. But it could have been worse; they could have assumed I didn’t turn up and failed me.

  Winters School of Fine Arts was, obviously, a school dedicated to the arts. But we also did things like Maths and Sciences as well. And those teachers tended to remember who I was, especially compared to Ella who was rubbish at all those things.

  When the bell rang, I picked up my stuff and wandered to the auditorium for the Formal Committee meeting.

  “Hey, you!”

  I smiled and didn’t look at her. “Hey, yourself.”

  “Where are you going? Freedom is that-a-way.” Rica pointed like I might have forgotten my way around the school.

  I nodded. “Committee meeting.”

  “But you’re not actually on the committee. The committee is for Year Twelves…”

  I shrugged. “I told Ella I’d go.”

  “Gin, come on! Let Her Lowness go to her own committee meeting.”

  “I told Milly I’d be there, too.”

  “Why the hell did you do that?”

  I looked up from my feet. “Well… I committed.”

  “God, I love your loyalty. But you leave none for yourself.” She held her hands up like she was strangling me.

  I shrugged again. “Eh, I’m nothing if not consistent.”

  “That’s the beaten down spirit we know and love,” Rica said encouragingly, pumping her fist through the air across her body.

  I smirked. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “All right. Woo good! Woo well! Whatever! Go woo!”

  I nodded. “Yep, sure. Because I can put two words together in front of him.”

  “Practise makes what, Chloe Cowan?” she asked in the perfect annoyed imitation of my mother.

  “Perfect,” I laughed.

  “Exactly. Now, go practise.”

  I shook my head and waved my arm at her as we parted ways and I found my way back to the auditorium. It was one of the smaller ones, with a stage and retractable seating. It was never booked for productions in Term Three because the formal committee took it over and the formal would be held there. As I walked in, I tried to envision what it would look like all set up; I’d never had any other reason to be anywhere near formal preparations before, not that I was thrilled by the prospect at that moment either.

  The place had trestle tables set up and boxes and stacks of poster board and paper. It looked like the formal committee had put the five closest Officeworks out of business.

  “Well, at least you weren’t late today,” Lindy huffed and I frowned at her.

  “I just couldn’t wait to see your beautiful face, Lindy!” I gushed and I felt the sarcasm was somewhat lost on her when I saw her smile.

  “Good, good… You! Ella’s sister!” Milly called as she hurried over to me.

  I saluted her. “Chloe, reporting for duty.”

  Over Milly’s shoulder, I saw Govi smirk.

  “Good. I need you at that table,” Milly said, staring at her clipboard and pointing to a table behind her, “and I need you to get a start on posters. We need them all done by the end of the week so they’re up for at least a week before tickets go on sale.”

  “Come help poor unfortunate me,” Govi called enthusiastically and I felt myself grin.

  Lindy pressed against me and flicked her hair. “Shall I help them, too?” she asked Milly.

  Milly was still staring at her clipboard. “No. I need you cutting tickets, Lindy.”

  And then she was off to direct someone else to wherever they needed to be. I smiled at Lindy, so glad I wouldn’t be stuck at a table for two hours with her drooling in my terrible artwork over the Quicksilver drummer who was waving at me enthusiastically. I watched Lindy shuffle off to her designated area and went over to Govi.

  “Hey,” he said with a smile and I’m not sure why I blushed.

  “Hey,” I answered, looking down at the table with all the craft supplies.

  “How are you?”

  “I’m fine. How are you?”

  “Totally wankered,” he gave a rough chuckle. “Eli’s on us about the set list and nothing we offer him seems good enough.
The formal’s a prac run for us, you know.”

  I nodded absently as I looked at the pieces of paper in front of us. “Is it? I did not know.”

  “Yep. We’re opening at the Entertainment Centre in November.”

  I looked up sharply. “Holy shit. Really?”

  He nodded, looking pleased as punch, and did an adorable little wriggle of excitement. “We are. First stop to proper international fame.”

  I couldn’t help but smile at his enthusiasm. “Well, congrats. That’s amazing.”

  “Thank you,” he replied, brushing off his shoulders and I laughed. Then, he leant towards me. “So you obviously know what I do, then. What is it you do, Clo?”

  I picked up the theme code and wrinkled my nose at him. “Enchanted forest?”

  Govi snickered. “It sounds totally whack, but I reckon we can pull it off. Now, quit avoiding the question.”

  I grinned. “Yeah, maybe. Um, I dance and I music-a-little.”

  “You music-a-little? And what’s music-a-little look like when it’s at home?”

  His humour was infectious and I couldn’t stop smiling. “How are you at drawing?” I asked.

  “Half-decent.”

  “Well, I’m awful. So draw me a big tree trunk on that.” I patted the paper.

  “That I can do.” He nodded.

  “Right. Music-a-little is I’m passable with a couple of instruments.”

  Govi picked up a pencil and leant over the poster board as we kept talking. “Passable? Passable at what?”

  “Whatever I put my mind to,” I answered teasingly, hunting around for tissue paper I was sure I’d seen earlier. I was surprised at the ease I felt around him, but Govi just exuded that sort of infectious calm.

  “Really?”

  I scoffed a laugh. “No. Two instruments passable. My lips were never flaccid enough for trumpet.”

  Govi snorted and threw me a humoured look. “Flaccid?”

  I nodded to him as I started scrunching green tissue paper to make tree leaves. “I’m far too stiff, apparently.” I puckered and pressed my lips together at him in perfect mockery of how not to play the trumpet.

  Govi packed out laughing as he worked on the tree trunk. “Wow. And how long did you try trumpet?”

  “Only a term a couple of years ago.”

  “Okay. So trumpet was a bust. What are you passable with?”

  “I can play the triangle like you wouldn’t believe. I’m like the Mozart of the triangle.”

  Govi snorted again. “Where the hell have you been all my life?”

  I shrugged as I ripped up some more tissue paper. “Minding my own business.”

  “Oh well, please never do such a thing again. Although you still didn’t really answer my question.”

  “You know my sister. Can’t you guess?” I asked, taking a look at my leaves so far.

  “I’m not asking about your sister. I’m asking about you.”

  I turned to look at him as he was busy with his tree, completely shocked that someone other than Rica, Super-G or Aunt Bow actually wanted to know anything about Chloe Cowan, not just the Ella understudy.

  “Hey. No peeking ‘til I’m done!” he said, covering the page with his body. “You play with your green stuff and tell me about you. What?” he asked as he looked at me and his smile fell. “You okay?”

  I nodded. I was very okay. I was just super surprised.

  “Uh, yeah. Um, I piano and I guitar.”

  “Hey, neat.” Govi’s infectious smile was back and he went back to his drawing.

  “What are you down there? Picasso?” I scoffed and he laughed.

  “Just you wait, Clo. Just you wait.”

  We chatted companionably about this and that while I started to colour in some letters with glittery paint to cut out and stick on the poster whenever he was finally done with his tree.

  I looked up as I heard Govi huffing a laugh, then followed his gaze to where Milly was talking to Elijah across the room. I watched in fascination as I wasn’t sure if they were fighting or flirting. I felt a hand on my head that lifted it out of the cocked position it seemed to have fallen in as Govi laughed.

  “A fascinating breed aren’t they?”

  “Who?”

  “Girls.”

  “Did you think I’m an alien or something?”

  He laughed again and I found myself smiling. “No, ‘course not. But I mean there are three types of girls at this school, right? Hell, in the whole world probably–”

  “Really?”

  He nodded. “Stay with me here. When it comes to Elijah Sweet, there definitely are. You’ve got the ones who just fall in a heap in front of him, desperate for his attention or his touch.” Govi winked at me. “Then, you’ve got the ones with half a brain who know he wants nothing more than another notch in his bed post, but they can’t help falling over him either. And finally, you’ve got the ones with a complete brain – see exhibit A across the room – who despise everything he stands for but still go a little ridiculous around him.”

  “You either think a lot of your friend or not a lot of the female population,” I replied dryly.

  He shrugged. “I can only work with what I’ve seen. And they, Clo, are the only three types of girl I’ve seen whenever Eli’s in a room.”

  I snuck a look at him from my peripheral. “And what does that make me?”

  Govi looked me up and down. “Well, you’ve got a complete brain. I’m just waiting for the little ridiculous.”

  I scoffed as I went back to my letters and he went back to the trunk. “I might pleasantly surprise you.”

  “I’m willing to bet you will.”

  I smiled to myself, then jumped as he stood up quickly and threw his arms out in triumph.

  “I give you…a tree trunk!” he said, excitedly and I had to drag my eyes off his excited face and down to the poster board.

  “Holy crap!” I laughed. “That is amazing!”

  He’d not only drawn a totally beautiful tree trunk, but he’d given it an old wizened face, making it look exactly like something you’d find in an enchanted forest. Suddenly, the whole theme didn’t seem quite as stupid to me after all.

  “You like?” he asked.

  “I like.” I nodded. “I don’t think my leaves will do it justice now.

  He grinned. “They’ll look great. Shall I do another?”

  “Uh. If you want to, I would think that yes you should.”

  His grin widened. “Sweet.” He shuffled his tree trunk over to me and pulled another piece of poster board to him and got started again.

  “Do you think the ‘E’ should be blue or green?” I asked, looking at my conglomeration of letters so far.

  “In my experience, they’re red and filled with hearts,” Govi chuckled.

  I looked up at him and found him looking at me with humour. “We’re talking about an enchanted forest, not a…vaguely enigmatic boy.”

  Govi snorted as though I’d completely surprised him. “Wait ‘til Eli meets you,” he said with a shake of his head.

  Panic flooded me as he looked around like he was looking for Elijah right then.

  “Ha! No. I don’t need to meet anyone!” came out breathy and strangled. Although, how I was supposed to talk up Ella if I never talked to him… I’d work that out when I got to it.

  Govi gave me a funny smile. “Nah, trust me. He’s gonna want to meet you.”

  “Ah,” I coughed awkwardly, “you know how we said I’d surprise you?” I said quickly, colouring my ‘E’ in blue.

  “Ye-es…” he replied slowly like he expected my answer to be good.

  “Put me down for a little ridiculous.”

  Govi sighed, but was grinning when I looked at him. “Not you too!”

  I shrugged. “Sorry! I try very hard to not be affected by the arrogant sod, but…” I shrugged again. “Curse of the female hormones?”

  He sniggere
d and sat down again. “The fifties called and they want their view of women back.”

  I snorted. “There is such a thing as tongue-in-cheek.” In fact, it was the rule by which I lived my life.

  He grinned. “But I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. Although, I am a little bit hurt you haven’t turned to drivelling mush around me.”

  “Oh! I almost did on Friday?” I said it like that should make him feel better.

  He nodded, seemingly pleased. “I’ll take that. What did I do? Just so I know for future reference. My panty-melter doesn’t seem quite as good as Eli’s, granted. But I can give it a red hot go?”

  And in Govi’s defence, the smouldering smirk he turned on me was enough to make my heart race and my cheeks burn.

  I cleared my throat. “Yours is nicer.”

  “Nicer?” he chuckled. “Well, that’ll have the girls leaving his door for mine.”

  “More effective,” I clarified, my cheeks burning hot as I scratched the back of my head in the hopes my elbow would hide my face from him for a bit.

  “Is this you going ridiculous? Because I have to say, it’s kinda cute.”

  I dropped my arm to look at him incredulously.

  “Strike that. Very cute.” His eyes were warm and he really did have a nice smile.

  “That is not a rave review, by all accounts!” I said, my indignation overruling any embarrassment or awkwardness.

  “Some guys like cute,” he answered defensively and I got the feeling Gabriel Costa was one of them. Didn’t make me feel all that much better, though.

  “Yeah, in a twelve year old sister. Not so much in potential girlfriends.”

  “Ooh! Who are we after?” he looked around quickly and conspiratorially like it could possibly be anyone in the room.

  I couldn’t help but laugh and I wondered what it was about Govi that made the girl who’d barely spoken to a guy ever so damned comfortable. And don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t a complete wallflower. But before Winters, I’d gone to an all-girls school for junior and then a co-ed school for one year. And anywhere outside of school I went I was shadowing Ella, so boys didn’t really notice me and I didn’t really have a chance to talk to them. I didn’t mind by any stretch of the imagination, I busied myself with other things. It just made things kind of awkward now I was wanting to talk to boys. Especially after growing up with the expectation that boys were marvellous and different magical creatures from the way Ella went on about them. Logically I knew they weren’t, but Ella had spent so much time fawning over them that my brain usually got all tangled up whenever I was faced with one.